


my world is disappearing (so stay with me til the end)

by ppobbomi



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: .., Alcohol, Apocalypse, But mostly angst, Drug Use, End of the World, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Natural Disasters, Suicide, Vietnamese Translation Available, lil bit of smut but not explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-08-19 05:37:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16528424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ppobbomi/pseuds/ppobbomi
Summary: Jisung was like the Sun came to Earth.(He was, and it did.)





	my world is disappearing (so stay with me til the end)

 

It’s twenty-three past eight in the evening, yet the Sun still peeks intensely through obscure clouds, casting looming shadows against the lone figures perched upon the veranda. Felix sighs at the deafening silence. It’s hot.

 

 

“You sure do light up the night, Jisung.” He strips off his shirt and Jisung rolls his eyes in the blinding light. If there was any hint of melancholy in his voice, it was ignored.

 

 

Felix smirks tiredly – it’s been almost two days since he last succumbed to sleep and they both knew that – but neither say anything and Jisung doesn’t force him back into the uncomforting holds of his bed like before. He fights the darkening edges of his vision and rubs comfortingly into the small of Jisung’s back. There’s a comfortable ambience between them before he adds with little tone, “You’re like the Sun came to the Earth.”

 

 

That hits a weak point, because Jisung flinches and slowly falls back into unbearably warm, clammy arms. He laughs humorously, “I wish.”

 

 

Together they watch the way the trees seemingly melt and sway in the heat, the emptiness in the tarred road and darkened windows in the neighbouring houses. A ping echoed from on the floorboards and a screen lit up, glared but still visible. It was another warning, and Felix throws the phone onto the pathway, watching it shatter.

 

 

He’s sick of the warnings – what use were warnings when there was already a clear outcome?

 

 

Glass from the screen reflects the beams of light, the world was painted a warm orange.

 

 

It was a beautiful hot Winter.

 

 

-

 

 

They sit together inside the sunroom of Chan’s apartment, the curtains drawn shut and newspapers from last week roughly taped to the glass. Every newspaper and magazine these days are the same, with analogous headlines printed in bold yet unnoticed. There was no need for current affairs anymore.

 

 

Jisung can’t sleep in the light, and Felix can’t sleep if Jisung can’t – so they block out the hot rays from the Sun as best as they can and feign the cool and dark night that’s absent.

 

 

The television flashes, the familiar jingle of a popular news program appears and disappears, before being replaced by the face of a beautifully superficial woman. She’s smiling, but not really.

 

 

Jisung and Felix and the rest of the country have already heard it enough, the warning, and they can recite it – not that they wanted to.

 

 

“The solar flare is set to ignite and reach Earth in approximately two weeks’ time, and the size of it will deem Earth inhabitable. Next, sports news.”

 

 

Jisung turns the noise off, and they lie together in a flurry of blankets and pillows, legs and arms entangled. The aircon is on full blast, and if they believe enough in each other’s embrace, the approaching Christmas will be like every other Christmas – cold and everything covered in a thick layer of white snow.  

 

 

 _Everything will be alright_ , Jisung tells himself as he listens to the peaceful harmony of breathing between them, and the rise and fall of Felix’s chest, _everything will be fine_.

 

 

-

 

 

“They legalized the pill.”

 

 

Jisung nods into his sandwich, and Felix looks solemn. The food court is bustling and it’s all relatively normal, there are even Christmas decorations along the shaft of the gate linings and the ceilings. Chan and Minho are sitting next to them at the table, immersed in eating but visibly listening.

 

 

“Those people just want to escape before the very last moments.” Jisung mutters, frowning. “They won’t go down well in the history books.”

 

 

Felix is frowning as well, “Well there won’t be any history books to go down in, well or not.” He’s not eating anymore, his tray left half untouched and the atmosphere between them is discerningly uncomfortable.

 

 

“Then they’re lucky, I guess.” Jisung mumbles.

 

 

Felix whispers something under his breath that’s barely audible, but Jisung catches it anyways. “Hyunjin and Seungmin took it last night.” His voice is strained as if he’s swallowing on a rock and his knuckles turn white at his grip against the stained marble table. All three of them look at him.

 

 

“Oh.” Is all that Jisung responds with. Hyunjin and Seungmin were friends of his – albeit not close enough to be considered close like he was with Felix or Chan or Minho, but close enough for him to feel something. His heart drops slightly and suddenly his sandwich doesn’t seem appealing anymore.

 

 

Chan and Minho look desolately at each other, and its Chan that speaks up, “Together?”

 

 

Felix nods, and they’re back into a tract of silence. Children run and scream around them, their voices echoing and bouncing off walls and unaware of their inevitable fates. Jisung watches their scrunched faces and absurdly dramatic expressions and wishes that he was as unaware as they were. As naïve. It would’ve hurt less, he guesses.

 

 

Jisung turns to his tray and picks his sandwich back up, and they all resume eating.

 

 

-

 

 

Its two weeks until the solar flare when Minho suggests they go to America. It’s an absurd yet crafty suggestion, to spend their final days in a new and unknown environment. They had money that they could blow – not that money was really an issue anymore – and what better thing to do then get wasted and high in the free land?

 

 

Changbin is against the idea, “Why would you want to go to America of all places? What’s wrong with Korea? Everything is gonna be the same in two weeks anyway.” He reasons, and he’s got a point. But there’s a thrill to going somewhere unknown, exploring the outside world where it was dangerous and open and that’s enough for the rest of them.

 

 

Changbin entangles his fingers with Jeongin and persuades him to stay, and Woojin believes it’s the best if he remains on his homeland as well. And the next day at dawn – or dusk, or the middle of the night – the four of them are packed with nothing but each other as they board the plane. It’s emotional, slightly, because it’s probably the last time they’ll ever see each other. Jisung envelops Changbin and Jeongin and Woojin into one last hug and plasters a fat kiss onto each of their cheeks. He offers to sneak them on board, and at the refusal gives a playful yet teary smile and waves them off.

 

 

It’s not Jisung’s first time on a plane, but the thrill of flying always got him ecstatic, and the view of the sunburnt horizon and dark clouds didn’t even look that bad with his head on Felix’s shoulder and their fingers intertwined.

 

 

-

 

 

They reroute from America and end up on the beautiful shores of Hawaii instead, and Jisung is horrified at what had become of it in merely weeks. Felix snakes a hand around his waist and they walk together in silence, feeling the warm air blow into their faces just less of violently, and watch as buildings swayed on rotten foundations and smashed windows.

 

 

Jisung flinches and stops when he spots a small group of people – he presumes them to be teenage boys his age – and they’re walking in sync with red and green bandanas and masks tied around their mouths and holding baseball bats and what he thinks are machetes. The other three spot them as well, and they drag each other away from the main paths and run among the smaller dirt paths that separate the beach and the sea from civilization.

 

 

They don’t know where they’re going, but Jisung manages to smile as he runs. His heart is quickening and both of his hands are clasped.

 

 

They stop by the edge where everything is peaceful mostly, apart from the seagulls and cicadas, and sit by the edge of the road. Its hotter than it was in Korea, and Jisung can’t find it in himself to keep his shirt on for more than a few seconds in his spot. Felix follows him and they run, they run into the mess called the ocean. The sun was hot against their skin, burning their hair, the water was lukewarm and salty and the sand scratched at their clothes.

 

 

Jisung laughs and pushes Felix into the water, lying on top of him. The light shines into Felix’s face and enhances his pretty features, his golden skin, captivating eyes and constellation of freckles on his face. Jisung smiles, and kisses him.

 

 

From the shore, Minho shouts “Gross!” and Chan laughs. Jisung and Felix look at them, both flipping their fingers at him.

 

 

-

 

 

The walls are thin and its unbearably soft on the streets, and all Jisung could hear was the pounding of his own heart against his sticky skin and the gasps shared between them. There’s no one else in the hotel except for the four of them, the staff long gone.

 

 

Jisung clutches at the white sheets desperately, arching his back off the mattress as he moans Felix’s name, and brings his hands up to scratch frenziedly at warm skin. They had come to America with nothing, no clothes, no food, and nothing to separate Jisung and Felix while they’re within each other’s hold.

 

 

Jisung thinks it’s weirdly intimate, and Felix thinks it’s the best thing ever. It’s a warm and pleasurably feeling, almost as if there were no more boundaries or limits anymore.

 

 

Felix leans down and catches Jisung’s mouth for a kiss, and they move against each other in harmony, forgetting the world – forgetting the end of the world. It’s wet and messy and there more moaning into each other than kissing, but it’s blissful and Jisung feels he could just die there and then as he reaches his limit. He clenches around Felix and screams Felix’s name in a mussed slur, his hands falling to his sides on the bed. Faintly, he feels something warm trickle and fill him up, and smiles delightfully as Felix crawls to his side.

 

 

“Let’s be together forever.” Felix mutters, and Jisung smiles.

 

 

“Of course.”

 

 

-

 

 

They make themselves breakfast with whatever was in the kitchen, which was mostly just eggs and raw pasta. Minho prides himself in what he whipped up, and they sit in the large obsolete dining hall with their plain pasta and boiled eggs.

 

 

“Woojin said that people’s starting to roam around the streets now, smashing windows and attacking other people. He said he witnessed someone getting murdered.” Chan tells them the news, and Jisung shudders. “I guess it isn’t just an American thing.”

 

 

There’s a week until it all ends, and people are making the most of it. They’re in an isolated part of the city, and they’re safe they think. They really are, and when Jisung and Felix roam to the main part of the city to see what’s going on, all they encounter is havoc. There’s screaming in both terror and ecstasy, blazing fires that make the air even more putrid and hot than it was originally, it’s a mess. Felix holds onto Jisung’s wrist tightly as they maneuver around the area, and step over a body. Jisung tries not to gag and they regret their decision to try to satisfy their curiosity.

 

 

There’s a week until it all ends, and if they didn’t get out of there soon, they won’t be alive to reach a week.

 

 

They run past the edge of town and Jisung skids to a stop in front of a darkened yet unharmed shop. Felix peers at him curiously and they enter the unattended shop. They enter with empty hands, and exit with arms full of alcohol.

 

 

Minho is overjoyed, and Chan is wary. But he doesn’t seem to think much of it because _they’re gonna die anyways_ and everyone’s legal when there were no laws anymore.

 

 

They’re drunk in a mere hour.

 

 

Jisung cries as he thinks about Hyunjin and Seungmin, and Felix calls Changbin because he misses him. The call doesn’t go through – he’s pretty sure that all the landlines in Hawaii are already cut off so it was next to impossible to even get his call to Korea. Chan and Minho disappear into their own room and leave Jisung and Felix on their own in their sorrows.

 

 

“I miss Changbin-hyung and Woojin-hyung and Jeonginnie.” Felix sniffs, and throws the empty bottle from his hands. Jisung snuggles into his hold.

 

 

“I miss Seungmin and Hyunjin. I wish I could’ve said goodbye.”

 

 

Felix hugs him tightly, and the world around them spins. Neither are sober but they know what they’re doing, and don’t forget their fates.

 

 

“You better stay with me until the end, Jisung.”

 

 

Jisung smiles, and nods.

 

 

-

 

 

There’s no electricity anymore, and it’s too hot to go outside. There are no newspapers to cover up the windows, so they sit together in the room, naked and fanning themselves.

 

 

Chan is playing with Minho’s hair, their skin stuck together. Chan is humming a tune that none of them recognize, even though they all know the songs that Chan produces. Jisung assumes it’s just the heat playing with their minds.

 

 

Jisung isn’t sure if he’s ready, if he’s done everything that he’s wanted to do and crossed off all the things on his bucket list. But he was limited to what he could do when are the pilots are dead and you’re stuck on an island with murderers and arsonists everywhere.

 

 

He guesses it’s okay though, at least with Chan and Minho, and mostly Felix there. There’s no more Changbin or Jeongin or Woojin because South Korea was bombed by the North three days ago, and there hadn’t been Seungmin or Hyunjin in two weeks. It was just the four of them.

 

 

Jisung turns around and faces Felix, a sad smile on his face.

 

 

“I love you so much, Jisung.” Felix mutters, and neither Minho or Chan snicker or comment. They’re probably too lost in each others presence.

 

 

Jisung trembles, “I love you too.” He manages to whisper out.

 

 

It’s hot. Unbearably hot, and his skin itches. But he keeps his hands intertwined with Felix’s. He’s lost count of how long the world has left and he’s terrified and scared, but it doesn’t matter.

 

 

All that matters was that Felix was with him to the very last second.

 

 

It’s silent and then the room is suddenly blindingly bright, and Jisung sees Felix’s warm smile one last time before the world goes up in flames.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Vietnamese Translation  
> Many thanks to the translator  
> does the link work?? idk if it works lmao  
> https://www.wattpad.com/story/170212037-trans-hanlix-straykids-my-world-is-disappearing


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